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Doctor Who Series 2, Episode 2 Review: Tooth and Claw

Updated: Jul 25

What did you think of this episode?

  • Sonic!

  • Good!

  • Bumpy-wumpy!

  • Exterminate!


Ah, now, I have reached an episode that wasn't really for me. I don't hate it (I haven't got it in me to REALLY hate anything of Doctor Who), I just don't particularly like it. It is certainly not an episode I have revisited.


I actually can't put my finger on why, I did find myself zoning out a bit when watching this again though.


"Oh, I’m dazed and confused. I’ve been chasing this wee naked child over hill and over dale. I’nt that right, ya timorous beastie?"


It may just be my hatred for the royal family. I am firmly in the Christopher Ecclestone camp when it comes to them. I wish someone stood in this election and said right, these fuckers are going, they would get my vote instantly.


Campaign for a homeless charity and how many properties do they own? How many even lie empty for that matter? How much land do you own? How about you do something about it? You know, like give up a palace or 2 for a few people to live in. Sit around waving and looking important whilst sponging off all of us. All this whilst people get accused of sponging a couple of hundred quid a month. How much do this lot get?! How do they sleep at night?


I am off on one now. How many homeless people live in the UK? Around 309,000 apparently. How many properties do these parasites own?


Buckingham Palace - 775 (!!!) rooms

Clarence House - no idea but it has a morning and garden room whatever the fuck they are

Kensington Palace - 20 rooms apparently

St James Palace - over 100 rooms

Windsor Castle - 1000 rooms (Jesus H Christ)

Holyrood Palace - 289 rooms

Hillsborough Castle - No idea, but any place that has a throne room and a drawing room is too big


Then you have a long list of cunty named properties like Frogmore and Ivy Cottage. I am making myself sick typing all this out. What else is there? Oh yes, Balmoral Castle which is on 53,684 acres, Sandringham House, that's 20,000 acres, Highgrove House, Ammer Hall, and on and on and on.


I know homelessness isn't solved as simply as whacking up a few house and castles, however it would certainly help surely? What else would help matters? Ah yes, money. Flog one of those properties that gets used once a year and God knows how much money would go towards helping and supporting homeless people.


The only thing that ever gets said in defence of the royal family is ah, but what about tourism? I know our country is in a hole at the moment, but people could still look at the castles, they would just have people actually living in them!!


Don't even get me started on Andrew!!! You know the one living the life of riley who has done fuck all, ever, well apart from the obvious of course!! Mummy made that go away though didn't she?


My final point about these dicks is how could anyone trust anyone who calls their Mum and Dad Mama and Papa?


TWATS!!!!!


"Well, they were bald, athletic—your wife’s away, I just thought you were happy."


Tooth and Claw? Well, yes, maybe I don't like this episode because a Queen is in it!! That and I don't really like the martial arts monks all that much.


Oh and that quote above? Heaven forbid Doctor Who is hinting at anything gay. Cancel, cancel, cancel. Doctor Woke. MAGA. Nigel. Blah blah blah. Wank wank wank. RIP Doctor Who. I better change it, RIP Doctor Who 1963-2006.


Fuck! Right! Off!


I can only apologise, I am obviously not in a good mood right now!!!


I did enjoy the Torchwood set up though.


RATING: Bumpy-wumpy!

BEST LINE: "You want weapons? We're in a library! Books are the best weapon in the world. This room's the greatest arsenal we could have. Arm yourself!"


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