My back hurts. My neck hurts. I fucking hurt. I’m being thrown around - up, down, left, right, forwards, and backwards. The Jeep I’m in is kicking up sand behind us as we speed through the desert. Clouds swirl in the simmering haze, blending with the dust and sand.
Bump! I fly out of my seat, my head nearly hitting the roof. Is this really going to be worth it? My professor seems to think so. I glance to the side. His face is locked in concentration, looking more rugged out here in the sandy wilderness than it ever did in the classroom. He wipes sweat from his eyes, focused on the blurry path ahead.
I want to ask how much longer, but I dare not. It’s so hot - the heat inside this metal box on wheels is unbearable. Closing my eyes only makes me feel sick. My mind flashes back to a week ago in Professor Jones’ office. What on earth made me agree to this expedition? Sure, I wanted to pass the class, but I could’ve done that from the comfort of my own home. Now, here I am - sweating, covered in dust, and regretting my life choices.
“There, straight ahead,” the professor says excitedly. I squint at a formation of rocks in the distance, dark red against the sand and sky, which both seem the same dull colour. He slows the Jeep and pulls up a short distance away. I take a swig of water as he reaches into the back and pulls out a battered Fedora. He plonks it on his head, grinning.
"Nice hat, Professor," I say with sarcasm. He grunts in reply and opens his door, swinging himself out onto the hot sand.
I scramble out and circle the Jeep towards him. He’s blowing dust off an old, weathered map, studying it before looking back at the rocks. My eyes follow his. For a split second, I catch a flash of something blue in the distance. I rub the sand from my eyes and look again, but it’s gone. I’ve barely been here, and I’m already imagining things. Jesus, I’m not cut out for this.
The professor is surprising me though. He’s nothing like the man at university. I feel small next to him, like a novice trailing a seasoned adventurer. He’s unshaven, which makes him look younger somehow, and his scuffed brown leather jacket adds to the rugged look. His khaki satchel, bulging with who knows what, sways by his side, and—was that a bloody whip?
He adjusts his hat, folds the map, slides it into his satchel, and turns to me.
“Ready?” he asks.
My eyes widened. No, I’m bloody not. “Yes,” I reply meekly.
And just like that, we’re off in search of the Order Stone. I haven’t told you about that, have I? That’s why I’m here, sweating my arse off - an ancient stone, said to predict every major event in human history. Seems unlikely, I know. But here we are, trudging through the sand towards an ominous black hole in a rock formation of orange and red stone. It looks like the gates of hell. To make matters worse, there’s a rumour that Hitler had his heart set on the stone, eager to see if his twisted ways would triumph. Realising that I am about to enter darkness through the gates of hell with an imminent Nazi invasion makes me feel like a complete idiot for coming along.
We approach the jagged mouth of stone, framed by towering red and orange rocks. It looks like a huge mouth, ready to swallow us whole. The professor runs his hand along the scorching rocks, smirking. He licks his dry lips and looks at me. I nod, and he enters the dark.
I follow, my footing unsteady. I glance back into the light, and there it is again - another flash of blue. Before I can react, the professor yanks my hand and pulls me into the darkness.
Inside the cave, the professor presses forward, his flashlight slicing through the blackness. The walls are covered in intricate carvings. One looks like the moon, with a figure standing on top, wearing a giant helmet, a flag by his side. Another shows a large tower, almost like Big Ben, with the clock face shattered by a massive winged machine - not a plane, but something bigger.
“Professor, what are these?” I ask.
“Kid, we’re in a cave in the middle of the desert. Call me Indy.” He traces a finger over one of the carvings. “These were taken from the Order Stone, I reckon.”
Indy’s (how personal) finger lingered on a carving of a tall box with a light on top, surrounded by an army of creatures. The creatures were dome-shaped, with what look like plungers and egg whisks sticking out of them. I felt sorry for whatever was in that box, the creatures looked angry.
“Come on, kid,” Indy says, placing a hand on my shoulder. I jump. He squeezes it gently and heads toward a small opening.
I follow as he crouches through the narrow gap. It’s cooler inside, a relief compared to the blistering heat outside. My face gets smothered in cobwebs. I brush them away, spitting as they stick to my lips. Our flashlights illuminate more carvings, and that same box keeps appearing.
My heart races. These had to be added after the events, right? There’s no way a stone could predict the future... could it? I was intrigued by the Order Stone, sure, but now? Now I think I’m risking my life for something impossible. Spaceships, wars, the Titanic sinking…in space! Is this really our future?
Indy cracks his whip, clearing cobwebs, moving forward with the confidence of a man who’s done this hundreds of times before. I am now in complete awe of him.
“Here,” Indy mutters, stopping at a narrow ledge overlooking a massive underground chamber.
I gasp. Below us, illuminated by glowing moss clinging to the walls, is a colossal stone platform. There was something sitting on top of it but I couldn’t make it out from high above. The walls were covered in yet more carvings. They were arranged in a way that they became letters. They seemed to pulse with energy, as if the letters were alive. BAD WOLF they repeated, over and over again. That doesn’t seem ominous at all.
Indy nods toward a lever sticking out of some rocks. Wiping my sweaty palms, I edge my way over. Don’t look down, I tell myself. I grab the lever and, noticing another one hidden nearby, decide to pull that instead. I glance back at Indy, who nods, reaching for something in his satchel. I pull down hard.
Indy’s eyes go wide. “Not that lever…!”
Swoosh! The ledge beneath us gives way and Indy vanishes from sight, I’m left clinging to the lever, my legs swinging and crashing into the rock. I try to look down but can’t see him. I won’t last long. The first job I’ve been given, and I’ve killed us both.
My grip starts slipping, fingers burning as they slowly lose their hold. Panic surges through me, my breath quickening as I shut my eyes, bracing for the drop. I think of home, of safety, before my thoughts are drowned out by the roar of the abyss below. What a waste of space I am.
Suddenly, a strong hand grips my wrist. I snap my eyes open to see Indy dangling below, one hand holding onto a vine, the other around my arm.
“Hold on, kid!” he shouts.
I have no choice. My fingers are already slipping, but with his help, I scramble onto a narrow ledge. My heart pounds, but I’m safe for now. Indy hauls himself up beside me, panting. “I’ll handle the lever pulling from now on,” he mutters, dusting off his jacket. He reaches around me and yanks the proper lever.
The ledge rumbles. Indy shoots me a sympathetic grin - then, just as before, the ledge collapses beneath us. We’re falling again, and this time we have nothing to grab on to.
My eyes started to fill with tears, this is it, nineteen years old and I am about to die. I will probably never be found. If I am found I’ll be too much of a mess for anyone to know it was me. Suddenly I saw that flash of blue again. Then a noise filled the air. A whirring, wheezing noise. I blinked, trying to see through my tears. Then I saw it, a flying police box, its doors rattling as it flashed through the air. My brain struggled to process it, but there was Indy, standing atop the side of the box, balanced like it was solid ground. He stretched out his hand.
“Grab my hand kid!” he shouted.
I hesitated for a second, then reached. His grip was firm, yanking me up and onto the box with a strength that defied our plummet.
What the fuck is happening! The box continued to the bottom of the cave on its side, then as we reached the floor it tipped up ever so slightly plonking us on the floor before standing to attention with a final flourish of its motors.
I was speechless, that box is the box from the carvings. The box being shot at. The door creaked open and a man in a battered leather jacket stepped out, a huge grin across his face.
“Fantastic!” he exclaimed. “Never tried that before, glad it worked out. I’m the Doctor, and you two are?“
I didn’t know what to say, my eyes were stinging and I was shaking. What just happened?
“Thank you!” I eventually stuttered. “What is that thing?”
Somehow the Doctor’s grin grew larger. “Oh this old thing? It’s a TARDIS, my ship.”
Indy, who was still panting, was walking around the wooden box inspecting it. He turned to the man. “The Doctor? A doctor of what? Are you some kind of archaeologist, too?”
“Nope, just the Doctor.” he got in reply.
Just the Doctor? That isn’t his name surely?
Indy raised an eyebrow but didn’t argue. Instead, he adjusted his hat and gave me a sideways glance. “You alright, kid?”
I nodded, though my legs still felt like jelly from the fall.
“Other than making a mess, what are you two doing in here?” The Doctor said as he looked Indy up and down, seemingly enjoying his confusion. “Oh, and don’t worry, I would have pulled them both as well.” he added.
“We are here to retrieve the Order Stone.” Indy said matter of factly.
“Is it yours to retrieve?” the Doctor asked.
“It belongs in a museum.” Indy said sternly.
I had never seen Indy look so confused before. He was getting agitated by the strange grinning man.
“A museum? Is that so? A powerful stone reduced to something in a glass box for apes to gawp at?” This time it was the Doctor's turn to look baffled. “Look, I don’t know who you are, but I am here to get the stone, there are forces coming you couldn’t even dream of, and if they get it, well, the whole planet is in trouble.”
“Yes we know Hitler wants it.” Indy said. I lent back against a jagged rock watching the pair of doctors fire back at each other.
“Hitler? He’s not much of a force. What are you on about? Hold on a minute, did you say you were an archaeologist?” the Doctor said with a snigger. “I’m sorry, but this is not a job for an archaeologist, why don’t you get your trowels and kindly trowel off.”
Indy stood in stunned silence, but as he finally gathered himself to reply the Doctor walked off. He had pulled something metal out of his pocket and was pointing it at the wall. A high pitched electronic whirr filled the air as the Doctor studied the writing.
“Bad Wolf.” he said under his breath. “I’ve seen those words before. No idea what they mean.” He shrugged and continued to scan.
As I slumped into the cool stone I closed my eyes. I thought of home, far away from flying police boxes and floors that gave way. I thought of the girl I had never had the courage to speak to, my words never forming, the amount of times I have thought about walking up to her but each and every time sloping off back to my own little world. The world where nobody took any notice of me, except my Professor. I watched him as he scowled at the Doctor, then he marched off across the cavernous hole we were now in.
He reached into his satchel and pulled out a small black book. I bet Indy had a black book full of women's telephone numbers. He would be able to say hello to someone he liked. He opened it up. I assumed this book did not have a long list of women in it. His head bobbed up and down, from the book to the wall, then back to the book again. He smiled to himself then gave me a nod. I struggled upright and walked to his side.
“Follow me kid.” he whispered.
We walked across the floor and approached a wall and guess what was all over it? Fucking levers! This place is starting to take the piss!
Indy was muttering some kind of riddle under his breath.
Three levers stand before you, but only two are true,
One opens the way, the others bring doom.
The past lies in stone, old but unbroken,
The future burns bright, a flame unspoken.
One path will lead to light, one to eternal night.
Choose the past or future and decide what is right.
“Come on then archaeologist? Which one? Past, present or future? Do you need your trowel.” the Doctor said, slapping his hands on our backs causing us to jump.
Indy glared at him, slipped his book back in his satchel and walked closer to the wall. He studied it, closed his eyes, and carefully pushed down one of the protruding rocks. There was a click, then a loud roar as rocks made way to form an opening.
“After you.” Indy said smugly, turning to the Doctor.
“Lucky guess.” the Doctor batted back, before stepping into the darkness. These two are going to be the death of me.
I followed the bickering pair deeper into the dark. The air felt cool and damp, and there was the faintest taste of metallic in the air, it was just like the time I cried for days over my filling. That hurt. I could have sworn I could hear the low hum of machinery as well, I would have found that hard to believe ten minutes ago, but a flying police box later I am not so sure.
The hum grew louder, a rhythmic steady thrum. The Doctor stopped for a moment, licking his finger and holding it in the air. He shrugged to nobody in particular and continued on.
Indy held back, and took my hand, his grip was strong and his palms were warm and sweaty despite the cold. He tugged, forcing me to match his and the Doctor’s steps.
Finally we reached an opening, and we all shimmied through into a large open space. The rock was a deeper red in here, the rocks looking like flames licking up the side of the cavernous hole we were in. My eyes adjusted to the lighter area, and then I saw it. A small plinth carved from the rock, small and unimpressive. It was what was on top that made all three of us exhale in unison.
It wasn’t all that impressive either if I am being honest. A small plinth with a small hessian sack on top of it. We all knew what was inside it. Indy and the Doctor both smiled at me and marched towards the awaiting Order Stone.
“Suchen!! Lokalisieren! Zerstören!”
Oh for fuck sake! Just as a very fucking bad day was starting to pick up, the Nazis have turned up. I looked around the cave, trying to put a position to the voices. They barked loudly, angrily.
"Nazis," Indy growled. He clenched his fists, his eyes scanning for cover.
"Daleks," the Doctor muttered, his voice low and filled with a mix of dread and fury.
Indy turned to me, his eyes glinting with delight despite the strain on the rest of his face. I sensed another dick swinging contest coming between the two men before me, all I wanted to do was shit myself and cower in a corner. Ideally I would be at home being brave there, talking to the girl I always wanted to. I looked around nervously, the metallic thrumming grew louder, as did the screaming voices.
“Daleks?” Indy finally said to me. “I think you’ll find those are Nazis Doctor.”
Two lights began to flicker in the distance, then another two, and then six more. The lights revealed metal domed machines.
“I haven’t the faintest idea what a Dalek is, but clearly you are not quite right in the head. Maybe you need a Doctor?” Indy continued.
My eyes grew wide, I attempted to stop Indy from talking as blue lights began to be revealed.
“Der Arzt wird erkannt!”
The machines glowed, eyestalks swivelling menacingly. They descended into the cave landing behind Indy.
“The Doctor is detected?” Indy queried more to himself than anyone else. The Doctor flashed another of his cheesy grins as Indy slowly turned to face the bronze machines. “What the…”
Both men grabbed one of my arms and we ducked behind a rock. White light filled the air. The rock shattered in front of us as the light struck it.
"Hang on, hang on!" the Doctor called out from behind the remains of the rock. “Can you do me a favour and tell me your names? I just want to sort one thing out before we continue.” He looked at Indy, cupping his ear.
“Daleks have no need for names!”
Another grin.
“Heil Hitler!”
A throng of soldiers appeared behind the Daleks, their guns ready for action. Indy and the Doctor looked at each other for a second and darted behind another rock. I watched helplessly as the Nazi soldiers began to open fire on the Daleks. The Doctor and Indy bickered behind their rock, both claiming a victory that who they thought would come had come. I watched in horror as the Daleks picked off one soldier after the other, their beams of white light striking the soldiers, illuminating their skeleton before they dropped to the floor.
“Fantastic!” the Doctor shouted above the screaming soldiers. “Even you two can’t agree. You will never, ever get what you want, the both of you.”
Silence filled the room. A moment of calm as the Doctor spoke. How was he so confident?
“You think you can exterminate everyone who isn’t like you, but you can’t. Even you Daleks. There are some out there, not many, but I have seen them, Daleks with their own mind, Daleks who hate their existence, Daleks who would exterminate every last one of you if they could.”
Everyone had turned to look at the Doctor now. His hands behind his back, standing in front of the murderous machines and soldiers. What a fucking legend. As he spoke his fingers were pointing at something behind his back. Indy gave him the slightest of nods.
“So, what are you going to do? Kill everyone in this cave? Then what? What will you have actually achieved? There are still people on this planet, people in this Universe, who will never give in against your insane ideas. You will never win, never!”
Indy got up and stood by the Doctor’s side, his hand slowly reaching around his whip.
“What do you even want with the stone? Spoilers guys, it won’t end well for you, either of you.” the Doctor continued.
Indy spun his whip and sent it hurtling towards the stone. It wrapped itself around it and flung it back into Indy’s hands. Impressive. Indy quickly stuffed the stone in his satchel and he and the Doctor shared another look.
“Run!” the Doctor shouted, turning on his heels.
The cave began to rumble. The walls shook as if they were pissed off with all of us. The silence was over, rocks began to fall, shots began to fire again. White lights flashed past us, the sound of bullets hitting metal.
Indy was pointing towards a light in the distance, and there it was, that blue box, waiting for us. I took a deep breath and ran, my ankles aching with the force they were pounding the rock below. The light was starting to fade. The blue box was slipping out of vision. The opening was closing. A large slab of rock was slowly descending as if teasing us. Here is safety, but you better get a fucking move on.
I didn’t know where to look. Straight ahead at the closing opening, to the rocks either side of us covered in more levers, or behind us, Daleks and Nazis gaining ground. The two who were fighting each other moments earlier now had one common enemy, us!
These fuckers deserve each other.
Indy looked at me in shock as I snatched his whip from his side, I clumsily swung it round my head and jolted it forward. Get in! The whip wrapped around a lever and I tugged it down, Rocks began to fall behind us, a barrier from us and the evil shits. Indy and the Doctor gave me an approving look then began to run again.
I have never ran so fast in all my life. I shot past the Doctor and Indy and somehow I beat the pair into the opening, stopping to watch them both charge towards me. The slab of rock kept dropping, closer and closer to the ground. Come on Indy, come on Doctor, hurry the fuck up. Slowly but surely all I could see were the approaching pairs' legs, their feet slapping against the floor. They aren’t going to make it.
I held my breath. Just as I began to lose hope Indy rolled towards me, then the Doctor. Their backs scraped on the rock as they tumbled through the tight opening. The rock threatened to crush their bodies as it continued its way to the floor. They both looked at each other with relief. Indy went to adjust his hat and the Doctor patted his pocket. They looked at each other again and desperately lunged back under the tiny gap. The rock finally crunched to the ground and the two men slumped against it laughing. The Doctor had Indy’s hat in his hand and he plonked it on his head as Indy passed him his screwdriver.
The Doctor stood up and dusted himself down. “Not bad for an archaeologist.”
He walked towards the box and slid a key into the door. He looked at us and stepped inside. He pulled the stone from his pocket as Indy frantically looked in his satchel.
“Thanks for this.” the Doctor said smugly as he lent in the doorway, taking a closer look. His face switched from jaunty to suspicious to angry in an instant. He pulled his device from his pocket, pointing it at the stone, its blue light reflecting at all angles in the sunlight.
“Fake!” he said with a shrug and a look of disappointment. "See you around Doctor Jones."
He gave one last grin and then tossed the stone at me, I caught it as I watched him close the door and listen as the blue box began to moan. I had seen everything today so I wasn't all that surprised when the thing faded from sight as if it was never there.
I turned the stone in my hand, there were no visions of the future, no signs of Nazi or Dalek forces taking over the world, thank fuck. There was something on it though, it was writing, but not a carving like you would expect, it was ink, the playful scrawl of a pen.
Nice try Doctor x
I passed it to Indy and he let out a chuckle.
“Some you win, some you lose kid.”
“How did you work that riddle out by the way?” I asked.
“Lucky guess kid, lucky guess.” he ruffled my hair and marched up the sandy dunes towards the Jeep.
It took ages to get back home, truck, train, boat and plane, nine days. Nine long days. We were home though, back at the University. We smelt, we were tired. We were disappointed we were coming home with nothing but a graffitied clear rock.
“I’ll drive you home.” Indy said glumly as we walked through the hall towards his office. I was gutted we didn’t have anything to show for all our troubles but I was thrilled to be back in a building made of bricks, with walls, and wallpaper and lights and heating. By the way, if you were wondering, I called the girl from a phone box in Paris, she wants to be friends, but that’s fine, I can take that, at least I asked.
Indy looked troubled, his office door was open. He always locked it when he wasn’t in. I glanced in through the opening, I saw the edge of his desk, a pair of heels rested atop of it. Next to them was a hessian bag tied neatly with string, it was the exact same bag as the cave. Indy slowly pushed the door open and we both stood in shock.
There she was, her bouncy hair, her heels, her book that never left her side. I had missed her so much.
“Hi Mum, what are you doing here?”
“Hello sweetie, was he making fun of archaeologists again?” she said.
You made it to the end - congratulations!! Thank you for reading and I really hope you enjoyed it.
Thank you once again to the legends who brought my story to life:
Oh and don't forget - we're all stories in the end, just make it a good one eh!
#DoctorWho #Disney #DWFanFic #DWFanArt #DWFanFiction #FanFiction #Nine #ChristopherEccleston #IndianaJones #HarrisonFord #RiverSong #Daleks #DoctorWhatIf #Sonic #BlueBox #TARDIS #Christmas #HelloSweetie #DoctorWhatIf
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